This may sound a little gross, but I think I have athlete's foot. Now, that's a little strange to me, because I am not an athlete. I do have feet, though, and they are itchin'! The slogan for Tinactin, Tough Actin' Tinactin, made me really think as I slathered the white gunk between my toes tonight. I'm so much like Tinactin. I can't think how many times a day I act tough. I like to think I can do anything myself. You know, move a couch down three flights of stairs, move a stereo cabinet down those same three flights, or fix my toilet. I'm so set on doing things without asking for help that I think I'm physically incapable of asking for it. This is me acting tough.
I try to do my life on my own all the time, and it wears me out. I get tired and snappy and klutzy. I try to things in my own strength, and I push through and get things done. The whole time though, I'm thinking that I just need some help. I need a recuer. I need someone to tell me I'm not crazy because I talk to my Google homepage. I need someone to eat my dinner with or someone to tell me not to be afraid because I have to sleep with the windows open. I need someone to help me figure out my insurance plan at work. Then, the Spirit reminds me that I am not and will never be alone.
My friend Pete, sometimes called Lee, beautifully delivered the Word this Sunday morning and reminded me that God really is working EVERYTHING together for good in my life. And, if I really believe that, in those moments when I feel lonely, I will recognize them for what they are. Maybe they are reminders that we are not home yet. Maybe those moments are the times when He would have me remember how much He loves me, that He even says He is the shade on my right hand. He's that close, knows me that well, and loves me infintely more than I could ever imagine. Pete also reminded us that one day, we will see the brilliant way our Father has been orchestrating our lives. I was just telling the same thing to someone the other day. We were talking about heaven and what it would be like. Would the questions be answered? What would we learn about our Lord? And the thought I could not escape was that when we get there, we will be overjoyed, awed, amazed at the wonder of His love and His perfect plan. We will see that He has loved us purely, perfectly, and proufoundly throughout each moment of our lives. And so, why should ever feel alone?
The God of the universe is intimately involved in my life, and I am never out of His protection or care. Earlier in the week, I prayed that He would let me see my friend Reagan at school. I just asked that He would let me see her that day. Just before seventh period she popped by my room a walking miracle with the sweetest smile. And I could have shouted for joy (I almost did!)! He answered my prayer right then and there. That's the God I need to believe in, because that's the one I server, not the one I imagine when I imagine myself in miserable loneliness. Thankfully, He is the great God who takes care of me and gives me words like the ones He did this Tuesday. I read Psalms 125: 1-2. Those verses say: "Those who trust n the Lord are as Mount Zion, which cannot be moved but abides forever. As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds His people from this time forth and forever." See! He surrounds me! I never have to be afraid of sleeping with the windows open or feel that I'm alone. God Himself is with me and takes care of me. Ahhhh, there is such freedom in His safety. I hope He will keep reminding me of that.
